The Paper Chase

FAQ

Where are you in the process of adoption?

The process of an international adoption is long and very detailed. The agency we are using is called Gladney and it is located in Fort Worth. The 1^st step is to complete the Gladney application.  Now this isn’t your normal 2 page application. This application includes papers to be notarized, copies of birth certificates, passports, ss numbers, marriage license, drivers licenses, proof of insurance, employment verification letters,  family pictures, finger prints, referral letters from friends, family, neighbors,  and the girls teachers,  domestic violence statements, pet vaccinations, and Doctors reports and the list goes on!!! The Doctors reports were fun to get. I’ve been tested for every drug and disease known to man and don’t even get me started of the stupid BMI test! 

The  home study.

 Right now we are waiting to hear back from our case worker to schedule the meeting. This meeting is causing me crazy stress! In my mind my home study interview will look like Piers Morgan interviewing Phil Robertson. I’m a nervous wreck! I know Josiah will breeze though his interview. He is smart and funny and well spoken.  I on the other hand will have to get though on my wits and right now my wits aren’t looking to sharp. Now here is where the real stress comes in.. the case worker is going to interview each of my kids alone! I will not be able to kick them under the table or even give them the hard stare smile that means I fear for their lives. They will be alone in a room answering questions about our family! My oldest daughter  will I’m sure “wow” the case worker. She is just like her dad. She loves kids and is super excited about the adoption everyone wants her to babysit. I bet she has already knit our China doll a blankie . My 10 year old (my mini me) gives me some reason for concern because she isn’t too excited about having to share a room and having  ANOTHER sister(she wanted a brother).  She is very smart and funny so I hope the case worker enjoys sarcasm.  Now my 4 year old makes me the most nervous.  Nothing get’s past her and she remembers EVERYTHING. Like the time when she wanted me to buy her this Mickey Mouse Christmas ornament. I said no… she was mad! That night at bedtime after reading her 100 books we prayed and I smiled and kissed her and she lovingly looks in my eyes and says “ You try to be sweet but you are just a mean mama!” She is a mess! She will say anything. Just yesterday she told me she can’t go back to mother’s day out because the dad who drives carpool has disgusting breath when he is unbuckling her car seat.  I can see it now Case worker-  “Do you love your Mom?”  J- “my mom try’s to be sweet but she is just a mean Mama” Folks I’m nervous, but as soon as our Home study is approved we can be matched with our daughter!

After the home study has been approved we will submit our immigration form (CIS). It can take up to 3 months for the CIS form to be processed so while we are waiting on that we are working with a Dossier service to help us with the foreign documents. Another fun 5 inch stack of paperwork! Once that is completed and sent to China and approved then we will get our travel visas approved, which can take a few weeks or months. After we get our travel approved we are off to china for 2 weeks to bring our daughter home. 

The Real Motivation

Now that were in the official process of international adoption and have announced it to many in our circle of friends, family, and co-workers very often we have been asked the simple question…..why? What led you to decide to adopt a child when you already have 3 of your own? Well, there are some basic and simple answers to that question. We want to help a hurting and abandoned child. We feel blessed that God has placed us in the United States and has provided for us so that we and every other family that makes at least 44K per year are in the top 1 percent of the World’s income. Bet you didn't know you might be a “1 percenter!” If you don’t believe me you can check your status here http://www.globalrichlist.com/. Also, we simply would like to have another child to love and welcome another daughter into our family.


 All of these reasons are true and good, but this is still not what lies at the heart and foundation for going on this journey of adoption. The heart of the matter is that we are also adopted children. That is, as believers in the Gospel of Jesus Christ we understand that we were once, because of our sin and rebellion, aliens, outsiders, children of wrath outside of the covenant family of God. The basic truth of the Gospel is that on the cross, Jesus in his substitutionary death lays the ground work for our adoption by the Father! We are not natural born children of God, but because of the cross, that which separated us from our Father has been taken out of the way. The wrath of God has been satisfied and we are adopted through Christ. Not only is adoption central to the gospel, but for God’s elect, this is has always been our destiny! “In love, he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved.” Ephesians 1:5-6.


So for our family to adopt a child is to proclaim and live the Gospel and bring glory to the name of Jesus. The Gospel is a story of a Father with a heart for adoption. We hope, although imperfectly and fallibly, to live and breathe this message to our new daughter and to those in our community. “For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” Romans 8:15

Adoption??

Adoption….my whole life seems to be preparing me for this year.

Why Adoption? At first I was shocked by this feeling inside my heart to adopt a child that didn’t come from my womb. I have 3 perfect daughters (12, 10, & 4) why would I want another? I was SHOCKED that God would plant this idea into my husband’s heart. We love our girls but we sometimes dream about our life once our girls are out of the house. Yes I’m that mom.

That mom who feeds her kids McDonalds.

That mom who claims that the family bed is the best because of the special bond but really I love the family bed because I can just roll over to feed the baby instead of getting up.

That mom who plays to win even if the game is candy land and that mom who has always kept the score at every soccer, basketball and softball game my kids have ever played even when they were 4.

I still gag at poopie diapers, throw-up, and snot. I am not the mother who "finds joy" in these activities.


I can be VERY selfish and self centered. Why would God plant adoption into my husband’s heart!

That was until I felt this nudge from the Holy Spirit myself. Somehow someway God changed my heart. As I think back over my life I discovered that the seed of adoption was planted many years ago. Now that seed has laid dormant for a long time but it was there. When I was young, my parents became foster parents. Our first foster child came into my life when I was 8. Into my home walked not 1, not 2, but 3 sisters ages 9, 10, 11. My parents continued foster parenting for some time. They had a burden especially for troubled teenage girls. My life was crazy! Can you imagine taking in troubled teenage girls! I saw my parents love and forgive over and over. My parents were also youth pastors and my mom also worked 9 years as a chaplain for a Texas Youth Commission juvenile prison! I have had too many “sisters and brothers” to count. My parents had the heart of adoption.


Not only was I raised in a home that loved and gave hope to the hurting, but I have been loving and teaching preschool since I was 18! How did I miss this training that God had been giving me? How did I not see Him softening my heart to love hurting children who were not “mine”? When I look back over my 32 years I can now see……Like Joshua when God called him to take the children of Israel into the Promised Land. Joshua’s whole time with Moses was preparing him to be the one to lead His people. God commanded Joshua to “be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Am I afraid? Am I uncertain, have I had doubt? Yes!! When I think about this enormous calling God has placed on our hearts I can easily falter but then the Holy Spirit reminds me that the Lord my God is with me. The Holy Spirit reminds me of Philippians 1:6 “and I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” God planted this seed of adoption in my heart long ago and now it has grown. Lord willing 2014 love will cross oceans and we will be flying to China to pick up our daughter. God will be with us wherever we go.